While it is rather difficult to say for sure whether or not your man is capable of cheating, the following are the tell-tale signs that should tip you off…
Was he with someone else when you met?
Experts believe that if a man only walked away from a partner after he met you, the probability is that he would cheat on you with someone as times goes on.
This is because men like that tend to be in more dysfunctional relationships, make less reliable mates and are less satisfied and committed than people who were single and available when you met, experts warn.
How often are you having sex?
Most people assume if they’re still having lots of sex with their partner, it means they’re not getting it elsewhere. Wrong.
While low or no sex does make it more likely for your partner to cheat, men particularly often become hyperactive sexually when they start having an affair.
It’s change that you should be on the alert for: if your partner suddenly wants a lot more sex with you for no apparent reason, chances are their sex drive has been awakened by someone else, experts say.
Has he stopped watching pornographic films/photographs?
A survey by found that half of the 1,400 men they polled stopped watching porn completely while they were having affairs.
Did any of his parents have an affair?
You would think that a child who had witnessed a parent having an affair and being found out would make them less likely to cheat. The reality is sometimes the opposite.
Psychologists say while it’s not a conscious choice, it does happen that the child grows into an adult who abhors cheating but finds himself doing it. Ideally, your partner should have happy, faithful parents.
Has he cheated before?
The ‘once a cheat, always a cheat’ belief has truth to it. And it’s worse if your partner has a history of cheating, because he’ll continue doing it. A true serial cheater has no moral compass and will often see nothing wrong with being unfaithful.
Other people cheat in relationships they aren’t committed to or aren’t happy in, others have affairs in retribution for a partner who cheated. Find out why he cheated. Then ask yourself if you can live with it.
How good looking is he?
A Harvard University study revealed that being good looking was ‘a relationship liability.’ A relationship with someone attractive is definitely more vulnerable to threats than one with someone who isn’t so appealing, especially if you’re going through a rough patch.
Interestingly, how good-looking your partner thinks they are is almost as important as how attractive they actually are. The more attractive we feel, the more likely we are to find infidelity appealing.
How much opportunity does he have to meet people and get away with cheating?
If your partner works in a same sex office with little interaction with new people, they have low temptation and opportunity to cheat. The partner who works for a large company and has a job that involves constantly meeting new people has more temptation than others.
If they also travel for work, there are more opportunities to sleep with other people and not be found out.
How much daily contact do you have with your partner?
How many times a day do you check in on each other and how do you make that contact?
If you’re texting a few times throughout the day, with at least one or two phone calls as well, it’s harder for a partner to get away with cheating. This is because it is very possible to pick up a lot about someone’s emotional state when you listen to their voice. The better you know your partner’s routine and whereabouts, the less likely he is to think he could get away with cheating.
How close are you?
A disturbing fact is that most reputable studies have found the majority of people who commit adultery are happy in their lives and relationships. A Rutgers University study found 56 per cent of men and 34 per cent of women who had affairs were happy with their partners.
So, knowing your partner is happy doesn’t mean they won’t cheat; but if you’re in a very close relationship, you’re much more likely to instinctively know something is wrong.
How well do you know his friends?
Eighty-five per cent of cheating is with a co-worker, friends and neighbours.
It’s also true that people are less likely to have an affair with a work colleague if they’ve met their partners: it’s very easy to pretend someone’s single if you’ve never seen evidence to the contrary. The more of your partner’s friends and colleagues you know, the more visible your relationship is to other people who may fancy them.
How much does he drink?
Studies say men who drink no more than the recommended weekly total are 82 per cent less likely to commit adultery than heavy drinkers. Excessive drinking makes us lose judgement, relaxes inhibitions and creates the infamous ‘beer goggles’, making us fancy people we wouldn’t be interested in when we are sober.
If your partner drinks heavily with his or her friends or workmates without you around, this is a flashing red light.
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